OH went to eat SOME great JAPANESE food that day ... ~ i think it was a wednesday night=) yums ~
=S i Just finished watching season 3 of dexter .. it was an interesting season with him and his whole experience of having a friend to spend time with, to trust and share secrets .. and if you watched the season you'll find out the whole friendship thing doesn't really go well with him .. pity~
but it gets you wondering, how much DO YOU really trust your friend ... ?? with small secrets? with deep dark secrets?? with all your feeling and emotions?? 100% honest ?? i bet everyone has their share of secrets that they would bring to their grave .. but have you ever thought of how LIBERATING it would be to tell someone close to you everything you are and bare it all .. ehhehe ~ and yet still except you for all you are ??
an example : if you had a friend who is a lesbian in an all straight group ... would she be able to ever admit she is one .. or just continue pretending to be comfortable in the group ... and if she were to come clean .. who the others still treat her the same??~ lol~
=D okay that's quite a bizarre example ... okay how about more like if you told your friend you were disappointed because of their lack of sensitivity .. that it's unfair how you are always there for them when they need an emotional pal .. but when the table are turned .. they act as if they don't know how to handle emotional conversations .. ~! meaning .. NOT Being any HELP @ all ~
if you were to tell that to your friend tomorrow .. would they realize and try and change .. or would they be hurt coz they never knew you felt this way coz of their lack of self realization ~??
would shutting up be much better than to try and talk things out ?? ~
sigh this thing called life is so confusing .. it's never black and white .. and nothing goes by the rules ... one minutes you could be on the top of the world and the next you could be standing under Malaysia's very hot sun and still feel cold .. ~
will finding someone who you can SHARE every single thing with ... every feeling .. every disappointment .. every bit of giddy, over exaggerated happiness help ??~
WHAT IF you think you may have found that person and down the road you find out you were wrong .. would you have to do what DEXTER DID ?? hahah jk jk .. but seriously ~ .. imagine the pain .. ahah ~literally~ from dexter's p.o.v~
my brain is just going in over drive again .. about pointless nonsense~
DIDN'T HELP at all after watching KNOWING .. which is another depressing OMG the sun exploded and kill EE .. which stands for everyone on earth with it ~ make you really think .. if you knew the world was going to end .. what would you do ... what would you regret .. ??
i think sometimes .. everything would just be better with HUGS ... i seriously think a Nice big HUG would make anyone feel better .. unless your O.C.D or not the touchy feely kind ... obviously hugs from the right ppl are better =) .. or pats on the head ~ lol ..
THAT"S why almost all long distance relationships don't work ... WHO is going to HUG YOU ?? huh ~ .. no such thing as cyber hug kinda crap .. you don't feel a thing ~
oh did i mention i watched this movie called Phoebe in wonderland .. and i think the big MORAL of the movie .. is .. NO one would love you as much as your MOTHER .. ~ !=) .. so true .. they seem to be always right .. and annoyingly true ~ how do they get so wise .. or have such amazing insight even when your sure 99% of what their saying is not true .. ~ seriously .. the amount of time my mom could have said i TOLD YOU SO .. would be able to make up a book as thick as the yellow pages ...
i'm such a movie junkie -_-~
i think i've changed within this few years ... i share more of my nonsense with people and less and less of who i really am with others ... ~ i used to be such a crybaby ... my parents would say, "a fly pass by also can make you cry" ... now i've seem to have lost my tear ducts .. and i miss them .. ~ i always believed that a good cry is very reliving for the system .. ~ my emotions seems to be bottled up somewhere .. maybe .. not too sure .. ahhh all this emotional frustrating poison ~ -_-
i doubt myself way too much than i should .. ~ questioning everything, everyone, everyday .. is not fun on the brain cells ~
hopefully i'll soon feel the giddy, makes you wanna giggle and jump kinda happiness .. that would make me forget about all this foolishness .. or would it just stall it till next time ?? 0_o
~heart~
~kat~
~kat~
p.s. do i regret for not trying ... i wonder ??
